Cling to you, holding you with both my arms and comforting me into your bosoms while my eyes were closed, my soul starts drifting towards somewhere, some new place. Somewhere I have never witnessed before. And it start trembling with fear knowing I am all alone, but suddenly and as always the warmth of your goodness give solace to my heart. Suddenly the axiom that “life is tough” changes into “life is beautiful”. And why not it should be for anyone...

If he gets your company while travelling,

If he gets your love while nestling,

If he gets your chest while crying,

If he gets your shoulder while fighting,

If he gets your lap for cuddling,

If he gets your lips for kissing,

If he gets your presence while hugging,

Alas...

If anyone could see, the pattern of your love for me

They would know, even god seldom get the love which I have for thee. 

Some birds arn't made to be caged, their feathers are just too bright Posted by Rajdip Biswas ,Tuesday, January 17, 2012 at 6:21 AM,

In the movie “Shawswank Redemption” this phrase was used for the character Andrew Buffet and not for any real bird. This metaphor may hold some meaning in the free world but a place like prison where people can’t squeezes a drop without asking permission for it, these words are alien. This film produced by: Niki Marvin directed by: Frank Darabont and acted perfectly by narrator Morgan Freeman (Red) and Tim Robbins (Andrew) is one of my favourite. Not just it shows how a man crawl 500 yards of shit smelling foulness for his freedom and how no prison can keep the thoughts behind bars and take away your internal freedom but also this movie display numerous encounter which are as clear as crystal.

The scene where brooks completed his sentence and after coming out writes to his inmates about the outside world. Explaining about how fast things move on the outside and for an old chap like him how difficult it is to keep pace with it. Very well it portrait the life of a full baked institutionalised man.

Also the part where Andrew Buffet uses his wit and acumen for winning the trust of jail staffs including the warden and single-handedly manage the entire unofficial dirty works. The part where on the command of the warden he manages to siphon the money supposed to be used on Shawswank’s infrastructure into the name of some hypothetical person’s identity. And when one fine day Red curiously ask about it Andrew said “the funny thing is, on the outside I was a honest man, straight as an arrow I have to come to the prison to be a crook”.

This movie is very inspirational one. Every part of it teaches something but the part I like most is which runs through the entire length of movie but mostly get unnoticed. The part shows how the persona of Andrew gets changed after his escape from jail not just within his friends but also with the foes. Before his escape from Shawswank, Andrew was just another man who had a good rapport with the jail official but love to keep in himself. He considered as a week target due to which the “sister group” also target him numerous times. But after his escape, overnight he becomes a hero. Every single person was talking about him. It came with such disbelief for the warden that he lost his speech. Very subtle way but with a big impact this movie shows that until you do something unexpected and drop the bombs around, people will take you lightly even if they know your potential.

Life is beautiful Posted by Rajdip Biswas ,Thursday, July 21, 2011 at 5:49 AM,

Have you ever broken totally from your inside? Have you ever felt the shattered pieces of your dreams stabbing your soul? Have you ever encountered such trouble where you feel deep disgust and nauseating up to your core such intensely that it almost makes you vomit? When your self esteem and pungent reality are in constant vendetta and the verdict seems impossible. When the mirror laugh at your face and you cry with such a shrill that it rips your flesh out of your bones but fails to touch the eardrum of others. Where your bad luck hit you hard and not just once but continuously and almost every time when you muster some courage and achieved little balance and succeed in pulling yourself back from the last whirlpool of your sick fate. Where there is no one to put blame for. When every single responsibility is on your shoulder and the burden is so intense that it pushes you into the earth. When you feel like your life is worth dying for. Where there is no one to take support from and, you simply don’t have the option to share it. Where the fact being, you known that this fight is yours and you have to handle it by your own. Where you are the only soldier in the battle against your ill fate. Have you ever been in this situation? Have you ever felt your heart thumping so furiously that all other senses become numb and thoughts get vaporized? When every passing moment bringing your soul closer to morbid stand-still. When this misfortune of yours take such a mammoth shape that your inner being get terrified and you wrap yourself with a threadbare cloth and tremblingly sits in a corner of your dark room. When you become so maladjusted that no longer you are certain that the darkness is caused by your inner sickness or the room is just not lit.

Sitting there for a long time and mulling about how to get out of this burden. How to break the shackle of your fate which traps you totally. Sitting there for a long time like a carcass who has been strike by his ill-fate. Sitting there the only physical thing which you can feel is the hot air you are inhaling and exhaling from your nostril. Sitting down you start to focus how your chest get expanded and contracted by the inflow and outflow of your breath. And then suddenly its strike you, this realization that you are still breathing, that you are still alive. That live is all about living it and since you are alive you still have the chance to live your life, and you can’t let this opportunity go, since “life is beautiful”. That you have a chance to change your ill-fate and turn it into good fortune. And suddenly for the first time at this point you realize that this fear is not you rather a transformation in yourself which continuously makes you realize that you are the architect of your fate and the choice is yours to make it or break it. You close your eyes and you can feel your inner self, whisper in your ears that “you are breathing, you are alive”. And just then, suddenly and swiftly, you realize the loosing grip against your skeleton. That the breadth you take fills your chest with courage and give you that extra push, that there is aroma of freedom in the air. And for the first time you feel relieved. For the first time you don’t feel the heaviness of your sick fate but the lightness of your courage and knowledge. For the first time you feel vindicated. For the first time you feel victorious and you murmur to yourself with a complacent smile….“life is beautiful”.

THE BLESSED CHILD Posted by Rajdip Biswas ,Wednesday, July 6, 2011 at 6:22 AM,

I am the blessed child.

The most privileged one.

I am the child of god.

I know no fear

I have no restriction

Neither do I fall into any jurisdiction.

I have no law to abide for

I have no one to take care for

No one can hold me back from being myself.

My actions are free.

No one can judge them,

Neither do I bother to justify them.

No one can hold me accountable for anything.

Because I am the chosen few,

Because I am the blessed one,

I am the child of god.

Chaos and Order Posted by Rajdip Biswas ,Wednesday, May 11, 2011 at 2:53 AM,

Till few days back I had a vague perception about “Chaos and Order”. By definition Chaos and Order have completely different meaning. One makes thing other breaks it, one delineate rules other shatter them all. But somewhere I had this vague belief that there should be some correlation between them that can’t be grabbed by naked eyes. Something more than what a lexicon suggest. This perception of mine gets vindicated the day one of my close friends tells me about the “Butterfly Effect”. Something which says that one flap of a butterfly could dramatically change the course of action of weather in coming future in a profound way. Needless to say, initially it sounds bizarre to me eardrum. For our logical minds it’s something which doesn’t make any sense. But I am fortunate that I am not soaked into my own belief system. I love to shatter any old dogma. And that’s when I googled about it and to my amazement this discovery doesn’t just say about the flap of one butterfly but the idea is so profound that the name coined for this theory is “The Theory of Everything”.

The Theory of Everything.....Huh!!! Isn’t that’s what our scientist community is trying to achieve. And if this theory compliments its name don’t you think that it should be the holy grail of our science. These questions baffled me so much that I thought I should take a look inside this theory and as I learned more about it it’s became clear that why majority of scientist community don’t acknowledge it. And it’s not just because no one can predict its outcome but also because it has no set of laws. Because the pillars of this theory are based on Chaos and Order. Because it says that out of Chaos order form itself and these Order form the next Chaos. It’s kind of repetition and the best selection out of it get promoted into the next level of Chaos and Order. Einstine once said that God don’t play checkered but I guess if god is playing checkered this is how god plays it. And these best selected one pass its excellence for the next set of Order and Chaos.

Darwin said...“Evolution continuous”. This theory says how it continuous. The next pertinent question should be why it continuous. Needless to say it’s a challenge thrown to our scientific community.

I am really excited to know about the outcome of this why part, but more so to evident that if this Theory of Everything is true how it helps us to take this fragile human consciousness of ours to the next level.

Lyrics of EMPTINESS Posted by Rajdip Biswas ,Wednesday, February 23, 2011 at 9:40 PM,

‘‘Tune mere jana-Kabhi nahi jana-Ishq mera dard mera’’

Ohh love of mine..

with a song and a whine..

You’re harsh and divine..

like truths and a lie..

but the tale end’s not here..

I’ve nothing to fear..

for my love is yell of giving and hold on…

in the bright emptiness..

in a room full of it..

is the cruel mistress ohh ho…

I feel the sunrise..

that nest all hollowness..

for i have no way to go.. not come…

And i feel so lonely yeah..

There’s a better place from this emptiness..

And i’m so lonely yeah..

There’s a better place from this emptiness.. yei yei yei ya….

Aa.. aa.. aa…..

Tune mere jaana..

Kabhi nahi jana..

Ishq mera dard mera.. haaye…

Tune mere jaana..

Kabhi nahi jana..

Ishq mera dard mera …

Aashiq teraaa..

Bheed mein khoya rehta hai..

Jaane jahaan Aa.. aa.. aa…....

Puchho toh itna kehta hai..

And i feel so lonely yeah..

There’s a better place from this emptiness..

And i’m so lonely yeah..

There’s a better place from this emptiness.. yei yei yei ya….

Aa.. aa.. aa…..

ROHAN RATHORE a true lover from IIT Guwahati was suffering from cancer. He sang this song for Supriya a girl he loved more than anything and anyone in the world. Unfortunately she didn't return his love but this song was something he felt he had to do. He died just 15 days after recording this song.

Download the song from http://bit.ly/rohan_rathore

The day I wake from serenity Posted by Rajdip Biswas ,Wednesday, December 23, 2009 at 3:49 AM,

You like dew fallen on woods, like the dawn after a long peach dark night, like a fresh breath of air, like the cacophony of birds while spring hits the corner, like the aroma of soil wafting across after the first rain. Yes it’s you baby. Smell like honey, fairer then milk, lips softer then rose pallets, eyes luminous enough to hold my breath...Nectar of youth. Yes it’s you....an epitome of soft and tender love.
I am afraid but till now I never dreamed about you. I beg my pardon but till now I never fall for you. Oh baby don’t you ever think that you mean nothing to me. God knows how much I admire you, love you, and cherish you. I care for you sweetheart. The desire of having you is so strong so profound, I always afraid that just dreaming about you can make me mad. It would be like a wildfire. I knew it’s palpable, I knew that just dreaming about you can crave me, corrode me. I was just trying to control that temptation. You know baby that I can’t hold myself back from embrace you, love you, kiss you, play with you, watching you smiling and lost myself into it....While you gazing at me with sweet juvenile but enigmatic eyes, forcing me to think that even the deepest secret is known to you, while my heart starts thumping hard, your sudden breathtaking smile make me feel like moron. Oh what a moment that would be......Yes you are the reflection of my love, the key of all my secrets.
The day I wake from this beautiful serenity, the day your arrival was sealed and conformed by my alter ego, I was in awe. A calm breeze holding the conformation of your arrival waft across my ears, enter through it and what’s radiated out was fatherhood. It unleashes all my soft and tender feelings for you. Sardonically one half of mine was quivering hard, convincing myself.......“So what if you have taken a different path to reach up to me, the destination is predefined, yes its predefined baby that you are mine. It doesn’t matter from where your genesis coming from, what matters is where future will take you to. I am confident enough that future is holding me too into his frame of time with you”. Other half of mine was smiling in complacent manner as if I was waiting for this moment, holding few droplets in my eyes and few passing my chicks, my smiling lips and dangling on my chin. As if just now I got another reason, another reason to live, another reason to die for.
From that day till now, I am waiting for you baby. So what if our rendezvous has postponed by few months, so what if there are few hurdles in our path, so what if I need to put a little halt in my unquenchable desire to hold you. You are my little angel baby and no one can hold us back from this tryst. The day is near, we will meet baby. The serendipity is coming. Oh please come soon I am waiting for you.

A Voyage as a “Sarkari Babu” Posted by Rajdip Biswas ,Friday, October 16, 2009 at 4:33 AM,

Few days back I encountered an article which surely comes as bliss for all ‘Sarkari Babus’....what was that article....well in this turmoil of recession it’s not hard to guess, but if u people still can’t fathom my hint I am talking about pay revision and stable performance of top notch Indian PSU’s. May be this is one profound reason why after this PSU groom became hit in every national matrimonial till now. Top PSU’s became successful to portrait an impeccable image of theirs that no one can deny. The shimmering peak of iceberg floating like a mammoth in Indian market even at the time of recession catches appreciation. Being a naive in marketing and finance I can’t fathom how PSU could hold their grip at today’s vacillating and volatile market....because from my point of view, being a PSU executive and working for 14 month now, I see some different picture which is not at all pleasant. May be working at core sector along with good debt:equity ratio make these PSU’s sail their boat this time over economic breakdown but if they don’t bring innovation in their entire process, change the mindset of their employee and importantly implement all their policies from the grass root level then there is no doubt that tomorrow they will become history as Global Motors. Here people are so much lost in flattering their boss to climb those stairs of hierarchy that they forget their basic duty. Mismanagement of Human Intellect along with no appreciation of talent from core is one more reason of concern. And all this gets magnified when people at the top of hierarchy become so much stubborn that they don’t even want to hear the word ‘CHANGE’. Globalization and competition are no threat for them, they seems complaisant in their nest and works with the same old pace. Although PSU’s are bringing change in their policies but it’s too slow in adopting and there’s always a threat that before ripening the fruit of change these companies can wipe out from their very existence. Well I just hope for the best as no one can deny this fact that these PSU’s prove themselves in past and played an important role in our countries growth. I just wish them to continue their voyage and move parallel with the growth of our country.

All I ever wanted... Posted by Rajdip Biswas ,Wednesday, October 14, 2009 at 11:38 AM,

‘All I ever wanted’....a tricky topic isn’t? Well let me put it very clearly that I am not going to preach some psychological fact or old good adage. So what am I trying to preach....oops, say!!!

Well you all people must have, many times dumbfound by déjà vu. Spellbound by confusion in your mind, trying to not believe first what you are looking to. Then-after few seconds maybe- you say to yourself-What’s wrong with you pal, why you are trying to convincing yourself, it’s just a déjà vu. Frankly speaking when I first thud by this déjà vu, it was awe, as I happened to be a child, who never ever heard of this word. Back then it was hard for me to digest. All those enigmatic perfectly timed action which I could predict with 100 percent accuracy. You can easily fathom that all this sudden enlightenment for a child of seven was really a strong surge in his quest to understand this complex world. Back then sometime I even thought that might be I am gifted with some divine angelic power. I never divulge this secret to anyone since I heard the word déjà vu......Well I must say it was a spiritual breakdown for me...all my divine power gets expunged. All my hope breaks into smithereens. From that day onward there was no more welcome for déjà vu from my side, although it’s not me who can control its advent. But now there was no charm no temptation, nothing. Till yesterday I was like....déjà vu..D’oh same old prat. Until today- I must say, I get haunted by this beast. Using the word haunted not because I am horrified by this beast but because I get horrified by the fact which it shows to me. A fact which i regularly watch but never admit to be true. This beast just change my prospective and make me look at it in a helicopter view. So what it showed to me??

You know back then in college, living in a kind of ramshackle hostel, rooms were so small that could make u feel claustrophobic, disturbance in the air. No delineation between your room and the entire hostel, anyone barging into your private space, anytime. I always dreamed about hostel room where all this things taken into consideration, as I always need my private space. Although I never intended to change the air of hostel (in fact I loved that) only the delineation between private and public, and little cosier room....Well it all came back to me. All my demands, wishes, all I ever wanted. How I get to know about it?? Off course my déjà vu. The sad part is, all my wishes about private space are taken care of, but along with it snatches my public domain. I miss it so badly. And moreover these wishes were for the private space@college. Why it’s happening with me now. I guess it’s the place where my beast@déjà vu comes into picture.

Few months back somebody told me about the mysterious thing about “power of attraction”. It was bizarre to explain what he told me without an example. In fact in never believed it till now. But now I guess I am having a reason to believe and one example with me to let you explain. He told me that the universe works on a mysterious power. That all yours conscious and subconscious wishes are taken care by some enigmatic power and you get what you ever wanted in your life. As if there is some cobweb of this power which gifted you back what you ever desired. As if we are living in a mysterious matrix of ‘attraction’.

Well now I can see what he meant, alas, in a very despondent was....in this cosier but aloof location of my present deputation. But this is not what I wanted for now, this is what I desired during my college days regarding my private pace.....Well as some people says, life is one big collection of different experience, so I will try to learn from it, and from next time try to wish something when I can prognosticate about my future desires.

Paradox Posted by Rajdip Biswas ,Thursday, August 20, 2009 at 8:38 AM,

It would have been half hour past three. I was landed in my cosy chair, satiating myself with a mug of coffee, pondering outside from window. For a creature from our urban kaleidoscopic society it would no less than a jaunt in the womb of Himalaya with such a quality living....but i guess there’s exception everywhere....I am jaded and surfeit with it. Loath with holding my sight on those gigantic mountains i looked on the road, from my window, which gives me a panoramic view of this small town, Munsyari. Noticing every little nuance made by peoples moving on it. This point of time as the cities hoi polloi are indulging themselves in the warmth of their family and blanket, only thing moving through these road are bevy of cattle’s and children coming back from school. Looking at them, i just lost myself in time. I guess it’s normal for everyone who had dote on their school time. Everyone in the uniform, it’s such a resplendent. Noticing every minute manoeuvre, specially done by those, who have just started this beautiful and splended odyssey. It’s exciting to noticing the gait of these little children, who are struggling enough to walk properly with their little body, big head (as compared to their body) and massive school bags. What binds me more is their juvenile benevolent nature, their hugging and cuddling, their innocent smile their jostling through the crowed, their boldness, their intrepidly pulling a dog’s tail or a ponytail. For them nothing is impossible. They are rather enjoying every moment with the flavour of their sublime naughty merriment. These little innocuous children unconsciously drawing a line between how they perceive this world is and how we as an adult take it. Everyone can notice this vividly, as i am witnessing, between these iridescent infant and their irksome seniors. This so called senior, seems lost in turmoil, their innocence is no more with them, their mind tarnished....sly, cunning and hostile feeling permeated deep into their heart. They live in a bleak atmosphere, breathing turmoil and splitting out poison with their words.
Not far from this flock of ignorance and innocent I found a prey (a weak link...surely innocuous) trapped between predators (a sly group), paying no heed no respect...Nothing. Spreading a foul in the ambiance. A foul so pungent that the aroma of Himalayan gust can’t penetrate it. A foul so deeply rooted in their heart, that the tears from the prey’s eyes, was not enough to awash it...not even close to bring mercy. I was wondering that their heart pumps blood or crude filled with sarcasm, animus, prejudice and dogma.
Surprisingly this is not new to our society. Everyone is playing this ‘predator and prey’ game, in some way or other. Maybe that’s what adulthood mean. Sardonically those who become good predator automatically get in the elite group of people who have the contrast of ‘nirvana of adulthood’. We all talk about religion, perfect way of living or art of living or humanitarian action or whatever, but deep inside we all know what adulthood in nutshell means. Paradoxical, isn’t???????

Lacerated Saccharine... Posted by Rajdip Biswas ,Sunday, August 16, 2009 at 8:05 PM,

Holding a null gaze, i was glued to my study chair. I guess i was contemplating about something. This feeling is no new to me. I hold this outlandish pain at the core of my heart from an archaic period. Year after year i felt this lacerated saccharine. I could hardly remember any day being shunned from it and now i guess i am addicted to it. Every now and then i lost my helm and indulge myself in this imbibe. I am pretty sure that this sweet venom is contributing a lot in my blood and whenever my consciousness wakeup form slumber (generally few times a day), it rushes directly to my brain and give me a state of serenity. Droplets rolled through my cheeks and dangle to my chin as a pendant think of whether it embellishes or glooming that moment. A catharsis followed by nostalgia elevates me from my present state, and then it starts.....I delve in the abyss of my past, lament on it mull about those wrong step i have taken. Little did i realise that i can’t change my past....no one can. Still this feeling revive itself as a moment of realisation for me and makes me paralysed. Today it’s a part of my identity, a part of who i am and what i loss in my life. Now i neither lament nor exclaimed of its presence but try to live with it in symbiosis, as this sweet pain is the only thing i left with after she.....

Highway or Roller coaster.!!!! Posted by Rajdip Biswas ,Friday, July 3, 2009 at 2:16 PM,

Some says life is a roller coaster ride, some say it’s a highway, Robert forest also says “Two paths diverge”. Well one thing is concrete that we all came alone and will go by same. Every Tom Dick Harry will traverse his path alone. Isn’t it mean that we all naked, living our life on mere plethora of choices!!!!Well i don’t know, but this aberrant thought brings one valid question in my mind. What’s the biggest fear for anyone??? Isn’t its being left alone in this world? May be that’s why a child is first foster by his parents, then come friends and after that in the aegis of his life partner, somehow to allay his worst nightmare. Sardonically “life partner” itself is an abstruse term. It’s palpable and logical, in literal meaning off course, that a life partner is the amulet for adding the link of your pedigree, alas, it don’t mitigate your fear of being alone in the highway. What if after all this, terror intrude into your mind and permeate it with all this harsh fact. What if you waken from this nightmare, terrified off course, and discovers that you are alone with no identity, no one knows you. Your family, parents, peers all just vanishes like they never existed, like this is the first time you opened your eyes after coming out of womb, like you are lost in this abysmal turmoil. What probable could be the expression? Would it be catharsis or wail? Would it be shock or shrill? I don’t know, the fact is i can’t even prognosticate. Can you....???